Monday, October 27, 2014
This is it!
Back in July, I ran into Babies R Us. I had the 3-year-old, 2-year-old, and baby in tow. We had about 15 minutes before we had to pick up the older three kids from their Vacation Bible School. Of course, the whirlwind pace of our shopping trip was making everyone cranky (especially me!).
But, we were on a mission. The baby had a major blow out in her car seat and I forgot to put a spare outfit in the diaper bag. I was determined to grab something cute on sale and have her clean and smelling better before we reclaimed the others!
I quickly looked for the clearance rack. Some adorable rompers caught my eye. The price was right and they met the comfy requirement. I selected a navy blue and pink one with ice cream cones...perfect!
As I threw it into the shopping cart, I had a vision of my baby wearing the romper. In the daydream, everything was just right. She was sitting in her Exersaucer (which she hates) in my clean, cheery, sunny kitchen, and she was smiling while watching me make a delicious meal. We could hear the other kids playing happily in the backyard through the open window.
The outfit and the daydream were sold. I couldn't wait to create that scene in my kitchen that very day!
Needless to say, the only accurate part of the daydream was that the baby looked adorable in the outfit...until her next meal! I made a meal in my cluttered kitchen...but it just edible (not delicious), and the only sounds that I remember hearing were sibling quarrels. There was no yard play because of scary thunderstorms.
This happens a lot. I briefly imagine something "perfect." It's been happening as long as I can remember: From first kisses as a teenager (most that never transpired!) to buying a house with my dream kitchen overlooking my dream yard (I really like my kitchen and yard, but...!).
So, my life isn't as perfect as my daydreams. I know that I'm not alone. Every once in a while though, I have the consciousness of mind to recognize a, "THIS IS IT," moment. As in, this is EXACTLY what I've always wanted, hoped for, prayed for, dreamed of (even if the particular circumstances had never crossed my mind before).
The picture above captured one of these moments. It was Sunday night after a very busy weekend, and we had just finished the crazy bedtime routine. Everyone had been bathed and teeth brushed. We had gathered in our bedroom to say our family prayers and read one book (sometimes it's more, but I was anxious to get everyone down!). I was sitting near the bed nursing/rocking the baby.
And then, it happened. My husband lay on the bed in exhaustion. I told him to wake up and hang in there...we were SO close to finishing the day! And then the kids started lying on top of him. One of those unplanned things. Everyone was happy (well, maybe not Daddy!) and everything seemed...perfect. My kids were so cute and so sweet (miraculously no tears or complaints of being squished!), and we were all together while cozy and snuggly in our warm, safe house. My only thought was, "Stop time now!"
The best part was that the camera was randomly next to my bed so that I could capture it. The baby's not in it, but five out of six happy kids is a victory!
Lord, sometimes I feel discouraged because life isn't matching my best laid plans and intentions. I think I miss some peace and contentment because I'm picturing something different. Thank you Lord for knowing what is best for me. Give me the grace to accept it.
And, thank you, thank you for the precious heartwarming moments that affirm me and uplift me. Please help me to recognize your hand in all the circumstances in my life...especially the out-of-control ones that come up incessantly with young children! Amen.
I had another vision today while buying some cute Halloween crafts at Target. I'm excited for the kids to get home from school so I can create the scene. Anyone want to make a bet that'll it happen!?
I wouldn't either. If I let my expectations go though, I might just be surprised? Here's hoping :).
NOTE: This is my October piece that I wrote for catholicmom.com. I'm just reposting here!